Gotcha Day!!!

Today we drove to the Foster mommy's house to pick up our bundle.  We unfortunately can't post any pictures till the adoption is finalized, (so you'll have to take my word for it) he is just perfect.  God is so good and we are so lucky to get this precious 6 lbs gift. 

It has been overwhelming and great all at the same time. 

We. Are. So. In. Love

Thank you all for your prayers, gifts, and love. 

Thursday is SO far away.

Today we got the most glorious news...

We will be getting a itty bitty baby boy on Thursday.  Yep, Thursday.

He has spent the first three and a half weeks with a loving foster mommy who snuggled him, loved him, and took care of him, preparing him for us.  We are so grateful!!

The Lord works in such splendid ways.  Things couldn't have been timed better. 

As we prepare for the newest additions, we sing hallelujah, rejoice in this gift, and will enjoy our last three nights of full sleep.  :o)

The WAIT

We have a whole weekend to wait. 
We have three adorable pictures, that we constantly look at. I can't wait to show everyone. 

We have amazing friends who are praying, encouraging, concerned, donating, and preparing. 
And we are so nervous that things won't go as planned; we are afraid to prepare...to dream.  BUT the Lord has this little guy in his hands and no matter what happens from here he's touched our hearts.
*so mushy and clesha I know, but if you were where we are, yurning, aching for this little boy, you'd say the same thing.lol*

Progress

Tonight we talked with the Social Worker to change our home study to be able to adopt a child with special needs. 
As we talked about our resources, plans, and the discussions with our pediatrician I grew ever more vigilant that this baby belongs here. 

I'm not nieve enough to think that this will be easy.  Nor am I bold enough to say we aren't scared.  This baby we are praying for has needs.  Maybe not so evident yet but his needs may at times become all consuming and uncomfortable in his later years.  And I know that the Lord is calling us to be a little uncomfortable, to go beyond comfort, and will hold us through our tough times. 

This baby deserves a family and we deserve him.  If all the pieces fall into place he could be in our arms next week...
If the pieces don't fall into place we fall into a holding pattern (whatever that means).  I don't like this senerio...so let's focus on the first one shall we :o)

Maybe Baby

There is a chance that our baby is sleeping tonight just an hour away from us.  That thought kills me!!!  We are waiting for the birth mom to sign the TPR papers and that won't happen till at least Thursday (if she doesn't go "missing" again).  There is no guarantee he will join our family BUT there is a very good chance.  Since we haven't been officially matched ...

tomorrow our profile will be shown to another birth mother. 

There are too many "what if's". 
My head is spinning,
My heart is hoping,
and My body is waiting to hold our baby. 

For now all we can do is wait and pray, knowing that soon this chapter of God's plan will be revealed to us. 

Excited anticipation, fear, and prayers

I get so excited every time we know our profile is being shown.  Is this OUR child??  So far each answer has been "no".  As hard as it is at that moment, I know that this is not where God wants that baby and we move on.  With that being said...

We are being shown to 3 birth parents this week.  AHHHH.  It's so much harder to wait when we know we are being shown right now.  With all this anticipation, I can use this time to reflect :o)

We have grown so much in this process of letting the Lord lead us.  Let me count the ways:

1. My once-non- negotiable- about- money husband is willing to take on more risky situations, being comforted by the fact that God is in control and that if the adoption does not go through God knows best and just maybe that birth mother needed the financial support more then we did.
2. We are willing to take situations that we once wouldn't consider.  Is this scary? you betcha...and when I read up on all the side issues of said situations on the Internet it gets even scarier.  BUT I know the Lord wouldn't place a child in our family if we couldn't handle it and we have a great support system with whom God has placed wisdom as one of their strong suits. 
3. We no longer fear the "money" part.  God has always provided and I know he will continue.
4. We saw this year (an only this year) as my year to lessen my hours to provide the home support our family so desperately needs.   We have opened our hearts to the likely hood that this may be a much more permanent thing and that our job is to raise our children however the Lord leads us to.
5. I have written before about our surrender to His will and we continue to find more and more to surrender.

We continue to lift up the birth families that will view our profile and make their decision.  I pray that if it's possible for them to parent that they are offered the services they need to do that.  If it is truly best to place for adoption, I pray that they find peace in their decision and that they can continue to be a part of their child's life through pictures and updates. 

My final request is for prayers.  I ask for them a lot because I know prayer WORKS!!  Whatever the decisons made this week, I will continue to be patient for God's time and surrender our hearts, minds, & life to him.

Money or No Money

When  your heart is called to adopt there is a fire that burns inside.  For us, our fire started out as a pilot light and turned into a raging wild fire.  We want to help children everywhere in. so. many. ways.  Then struck with the reality of how much adoption costs, we wonder HOW?  How can we do this?  God is great BUT...???

In our latest adventure we have given God the "but" and put our faith exclusively in Him.  We were recently presented with two situations both costing $10,000 more then we have budgeted for.  You read that right...3 zeros.

In the first months of adoption we wouldn't have even considered these situations, our faith wasn't as strong.  We don't have that much money, nor could we get a loan for that much, BUT today we offer our profiles knowing that if either of these children are the children meant for us that there is no stopping us.  God will provide as he ALWAYS has. And we will go wherever our child is.

I could go into a long rant about the unnecessary spike in adoption costs, or how unsettling it is to put a price tag on a child's chance at life....that's not my fight.  My fight is to be a mommy to another child who God so graciously puts into our family.  My fight is against the world so that this child sees the Love of Jesus and knows His peace...that's my fight....money or no money!

So much to be thankful for

But I still want more. 
Am I greedy? Sure
Selfish? yes
Desperate? at times

While my mom sits in a hospital room, I sit beside her praying for her health, her healing and her time.  I am so very thankful that the Lord wasn't ready for her to come home yet. I am thankful for the problems we were able to fix because of this incidence...and I want more.  I want peace for her.  Peace for the pain, peace from the loneliness of the hospital, and peace from the stress of watching your family go on without you.  I want comfort for her from pain and the sadness of an injury; and I want strength for her to push through this and demand the things that are necessary to go home. 

Isaiah 41:10So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (NIV)

A blessing in disguise

We have had a busy, unexpected day.  My mother who is 74, fell early in the morning and broke a lot.  BUT we found out that she only had 1/2 the amount of blood in her body as she was suppose too.  If she hadn't fallen we wouldn't have known and she could have bled to death.  We don't know why she is losing blood but at least now they can replenish it. 

When you re frame this...today was truly a blessing...in a weird way.  I continue to pray for her pain relief and that the Lord will give her doctors the wisdom to find those answers and they will be good!!!